Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Cory Kennedy is Dead


[Photo courtesy of thecobrasnake.com]

I don't think even Cory Kennedy-Levin believes in her one-time internet It status anymore. The Cobrasnake, which put her on the It list register, probably realizes this too, and is selling "premium" Cory Kennedy t-shirts while her star is still bright enough to see with the naked eye -- for a mere $109, you too can prance around where no one knows or cares about Cory with Cory Kennedy-Levin's face splattered over your chest.

She has put on a couple of pounds over what feels like the five years since she became a fashion icon for people mostly in countries where cannabis is legalized and lost that gaunt, wholesome lost soul look she once possessed. Instead, she looks like a greasy, homeless heroin addict. And somehow, she's been seventeen for twelve years now. (Okay, to be fair, she turned eighteen just last week.) New York magazine, however, seems not to have caught on. It featured Cory a couple of weeks ago in a Fashion Week feature, in which they published a chain of text message conversations between The Cobrasnake's Mark Hunter and Ms. Kennedy-Levin:

COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: How’s the gucci thing
CORY NYC: So freaking weird
CORY NYC: I mean
CORY NYC: I’m just staring at tome cruise and katie holmes
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: That’s so cool
CORY NYC: At least devons here
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: So its a si ti party
CORY NYC: No
CORY NYC: Its a celeb party
CORY NYC: Everyones here
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: Wow. Amazing.
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: Take photos
CORY NYC: I don’t even want to
CORY NYC: There’s just too many
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: That’s so cooool
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: To bad I’m not thereeee
CORY NYC: I know you would ddddiiiie
CORY NYC: Like donald trumps here
CORY NYC: Its redic
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: Amazing
CORY NYC: I’m so tired
COBRASNAKE NETFLIX NEW YORK: I bet. I took a disco napp


Ah, so young and so jaded. Blasé. Such a teenager, but so aged it's no longer a perverse fascination. Don't cry too hard -- Mark Hunter has more where Cory came from, svelter than death itself, and with a wider variety of substance abuse problems to boot.

7 comments:

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screw that loser

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