H-O-L-Y C-R-A-P

From FoxNews.com:
Jacko's Straight, Says Singer Aaron Carter

Despite rumblings from his mother to the contrary, 17-year-old pop singer Aaron Carter says Michael Jackson is straight and that nothing inappropriate ever happened between them.

Carter, who is estranged from his mother, also told me that his brother Nick Carter of the Backstreet Boys did indeed hit pop tart Paris Hilton , as was intimated in many tabloid reports late last year.

"He hit her," Aaron told me on Sunday night at the big Grammy celebration party following the awards show, "and he hit me."

Aaron Carter plays BB King's in New York this Friday, and has all the aplomb and polish of a kid who's been working since he was five years old.

Sporting blond highlights and a 42-carat diamond-studded watch popular with rap stars, Carter also told me that he continues to be estranged from his mother and former manager, Jane Carter . He's just finished a new single for release later this month and is working on a new album due in June.

I liked Aaron Carter, which was unexpected. Being forced into the adult world at an early age has made him self-assured, opinionated and not a bit clueless. He told me that he did complete his G.E.D. for high school, but that brother Nick "is a drop-out."

He said of Jackson that the charges against him are false.

"He lives in isolation," Carter said. "He would never touch anyone."

However, Carter insisted that he thought Jackson liked women.

"He'll see a girl and comment on her," Carter said, "or want to touch her [bottom]. He likes girls."

I'm not sure what to believe anymore. Nick got his G.E.D. in 1998, so I don't know what the hell Aaron's talking about. But the little Carter's always been a big liar and a bit of a mess, so I tend to believe ... not him.

What the hell did Nick do to him that was so bad that he'd have to incriminate his own brother!?

I need to go and reevaluate my life now.