Girlfights and two lame chicks

I caught up with Living Lohan for the first time today, mostly because I was curious about how big of a twat Ali Lohan really is. A huge one, I've concluded. But Dina Lohan is really to blame -- she is one tough cookie and completely on the defensive, combative. Except when she gave that Jeremy Greene dude credit when he didn't deserve it -- but I think maybe it's because she (and her daughter) had a thing for him and probably didn't want him selling more lies if they'd kicked him to the curb.

Would someone tell Ali to do something about her bangs? They seriously make her look like an Italian Mama. And maybe just lay off on the heavy liner and LIPliner while she's at it? Someone needs to let girlfriend know that it ain't 1996 anymore.

Things seem to be back to normal -- maybe -- for Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge of The Hills. Just yesterday, OK! magazine reported that Lauren became enraged when she walked in on Audrina doing a photoshoot in their shared yard, and Audrina was quoted as having said: “She was very, very, very mad ... She said it’s her house. But this is my room. I said, ‘We’re not taking pictures of your house — don’t be rude.’ It just adds to the tension. Now she thinks I’m sneaky and shady for doing this photo shoot, yet she and her team knew about it. She won’t let it go.”

But then last night, the girls were spotted in relatively light moods, holding hands while leaving Crown Bar in Los Angeles.

Alcohol the social lubricant that also makes you forget your grudges? Send Lauren two boites of Grey Goose so she and Heidi Montag can move on with their lives, stat.

The New York Times thinks Samantha Ronson and Lindsay Lohan are together too (among other things). For now, anyway.

The season premiere of My Boys was boring. We've been waiting a year for this premiere, folks, give us more juice! And c'mon, if PJ could have him (and we know she could), she'd choose Brando in a New York second!

[Photo courtesy of The Gossip Girls]