Birthdays and Bashing

A certain comrade of mine informed me that today is, in fact, Paris Hilton's twenty-fifth birthday. One is inclined to wonder how much longer she intends to continue her partying ways. Especially since rumors that boyfriend Stavros Niarchos has left her are growing ever-strong. Even Paris' publicist couldn't give a completely affirmative statement, giving a weary "I believe Paris and Stavros are still a couple." It's been a rough week for the socialite. Maybe she should avoid drama tonight by kissing her early 20s goodbye with a nice chick flick and a pair of fuzzy slippers.

But chances are, she won't be. She reportedly had a little (too much?) absinthe at London's club Kaberet Prophecy and slipped into the DJ box to announce that she was "celebrating [her] birthday and Prince is in the house, so I want to play his new single because he's hot." At which point Prince headed for the exit.

But just you (and I) make fun, because The Chicago Sun-Times is saying good things about her upcoming album. Or, rather, that they've been hearing that it's "surprisingly good." I don't know what that means exactly, since no one takes her seriously and anything remotely decent would be considered good when it comes to Paris Hilton.

This news is now a few days old, but apparently Lauren "LC" Conrad didn't have very nice things to say about her fellow Laguna Beach cast members at a recent appearance she and Stephen Colletti made at the University of South Carolina. According to Laguna Beach Hookup, she mentioned that she and Lo have lost touch, that neither she nor Lo had originally been chosen to be on the show at all, but the crew caught the two struggling with a car alarm in the school parking lot and thought they were funny. She said she "hates Jessica, Alex Murrel and Casey (to which Stephen apparently chimed in and agreed)." She may be getting her own line of clothing, after having spoken to a couple of designers. [Lauren and Jason canoodling it up, front row at NY's Fashion Week. Photo courtesy of Getty Images]

Stephen revealed that he never wears underwear and is dating "a sixteen-year-old eleventh grader" (who everyone is assuming to be Hayden Panetierre) -- she's an actress, he said, and "very mature." He mentioned that he had been dating Ashley Bashioum but the two were, sadly, no longer. Both said, strangely enough, that they had never really hung out with Talan Torriero.

The Kristin Cavallari guest appearance on Veronica Mars has been moved to March 8th, her show Get This Party Started has already been put on hiatus and ... oh yeah. Do I even need to mention that Lauren said that she really does hate Kristin? Even after Kristin extended an olive branch by calling her a "nice girl"? Hmm. Who's the bitch now?